2019 - a year of try

It has been a big year, I might even say epic. My first full year of starting a new business, teaching three new graduate courses, launching a Masters program, travelling, riding bareback for the first time in 30 years, living in Budapest for 5 weeks. It has been a year filled with freedom, worry, success and challenges. It has been a year of lessons learned and balance regained.

I have also hit 97 blogposts for my first year, and I think that is something to celebrate! It sure is fun to go back and remember the highlights of the year. I can only imagine what that will look like a few years from now.

So, as my final blogpost of 2019, here are my lessons learned, but not yet mastered.

Lesson #1 - Do the thing. And let go.

I should title this "gallop on the buckle". Such a difficult thing to do. My natural M.O. would prefer to "lope on the contact" as it provides some speed with much control.

My highlights this year all have bold action in common:

• celebrating the New Year in Malta
• galloping to Buckingham Palace and intercepting the Queen's cavalry
• visiting the Spanish School in Vienna
• exploring the Hungarian steppes on horseback
• discovering the Budapest Baths without clothes
• and solo trail riding bareback!

And I also celebrate the times I was able to let go, ride bareback, remove the bit. Being in a first year of a new business, the smart thing would have been to stay home and curb all unnecessary spending. Instead I spent 10 weeks travelling, enjoyed wonderful experiences, and was able to condense my work schedule to be even more productive.

Worrying about tomorrow does nothing but prevent me from enjoying today.

Lesson #2 - Keep improving. And trust in yourself. 

This could also be read as "ride the horse you want". It is common to give power to our surroundings, our context, our environment. But it also shadows our power in the equation.

I am often evaluating past events to see how I could make them better. I try (and sometimes fail) to fade the role of context in explaining the outcome. (ex. The ride was terrible because an ATV spooked my horse and I had to turn back) and try to stay tuned in to what levers, tools, actions I control that need improvement. And then I try to work on making them better (contact, seat, connection, trust).

While I keep striving, and getting better, I also know that I need to trust in me. 80% of success is work ethic and determination, with a healthy splash of luck. I need to trust that whatever might come, I will always be able to choose my attitude. It is our last freedom.

I also need to work on choosing the things I do. Which means being selective and saying no.  And trusting that it will be ok. This lesson will take some time and effort to master.

Lesson #3 - Try. And release. 
In this my horses are my greatest teachers. Especially in the release. It is such a struggle to slow down, breathe, and release.

But I have also learned the tension or the try is just as important as the release. And if we can find our breath in the tension then we find our center.

This year has been filled with risks and trying new things. And learning to release the tension, the worry, the anxiety. Learning to embrace the calm when it appears.

As I remind my students, don't worry about making the perfect decision. Most decisions can be undone.

Just pick a direction. And take the next step.

Ride on!